People treat conversations like they don’t matter. Multiple screens during a zoom call. Scrolling through Twitter while the other person talks.
Not listening. Shaking our heads and giving the random uh-huh or ya to make it appear like we are engaged.
This needs to change.
And sure I could make the argument right now that it’s about human connection. I could talk about how it’s the right thing to do. I could discuss how every person wants to be listened to and follow the golden rule.
But I’m not going to because that’s not working.
When something doesn’t work, change it up. So today, I have a different reason that you should take conversations seriously and treat them like a precious gem.
It will benefit you.
That’s right. You will get stuff. You will learn stuff. But you have to be genuine and authentic in wanting to have a conversation with the other person.
Great conversationalists display charisma and charm. They are able to build networks and connections. Think about that person you know who knows everyone.
Do you need an introduction? You can reach out to that person because they have connected with everyone. They do it by having great conversations. Great conversations lead to deep and meaningful relationships.
This is a powerful type of capital that the person has at his or her disposal.
In the legal world, this person is called the Rainmaker.
They don’t even need to do legal work. They aren’t the lawyer doing document review, writing a last-second motion, or even standing in a courtroom before a judge. They just go out and meet people. They talk to them and build relationships.
Then those relationships turn into business. A lot of business.
Maybe that seems unattainable if you aren’t a lawyer. But there are examples in everyday life.
Instead of being on your phone in the line at Starbucks, try genuinely asking the barista how their day is going.
It’s amazing how people respond to such a simple conversation starter. And like I said, this is about what it can do for you so watch how many little perks you start getting. A free pastry, some kind of discount, or some other perk you weren’t expecting.
Taking a real interest in a conversation also lets you make connections with people that can then refer you to other people for potential job opportunities or just building a more robust network. Life is less about what you know and far more about who you know.
The quickest way to scale your “who you know” is simply great conversations.
Other people will start talking about you. They will share the amazing conversation you had and tell others that they should talk to you. Now interesting people are finding you. They want to talk to you.
One great conversation can change your life.
And here’s the best part.
When you do it for these selfish reasons, you end up helping the other person as well. Now you’ve given them your full attention and they feel heard. It just might change their life.
Conversations change lives.
Throwing away conversations is the quickest way to throw away your potential.
Taking them seriously is the quickest way to finding a treasure you didn’t even know existed.
Want to have a conversation? Robbie@beondeck.com
Follow along on Twitter: @robbiecrab
On Deck Performative Speaking Fellowship announcement coming soon. Email me for more information.